I didn't know what to say.
I never did.
Instead of actually saying anything I just sat there, staring at the page in front of me, blank as it ever was, and I started to dream.
Dreaming of words that fill the air with meaning, dreaming of images appealing, and thinking of those who seem to exist only for those around them to reach the uncomfortable conclusion.
I'll never have them, they think, they say, they tell their friends.
But I won't give up easily.
This person, the beautiful, custom-built love of my future, simply sits and dreams along with me, only... fifty feet away.
Any advice, my inner-peace-loving friend? Or am I to war with my ego, a powerful foe, one that keeps me to my seat like a stamp never sent? Am I to dream a liquid dream that only slips through my fingertips?
No, this dream is solid. This dream is real. This dream fills the air with cologne, with a sight to drink in like the wine I wish I had, the wine that may give me the courage to stand up and touch this dream, to shatter the glass and bring it to life.
What to do? How does a vision of attainable godhood exist in a world of broken hearts, battered confidence, shattered Valentines and pools of dead love to splash in and reminisce?
My love, why do you tempt me with the fruit Adam accepted, dooming me to my fate just as he to his and his lover, beautiful she was, to her final punishment? I am destined to follow footsteps to this... this hell, am I? Why do you toy with one who would promise to make you smile a sun-blasting smile, show you the riches of life and the world through those rose-colored glasses we've only read in poetry? I can bring you not just the apple, not just to light, but to life...
Please, sit. Sit still. Let me drink the liquor of your aura just a little longer, get me drunk on your figure. Just drunk enough to warrant the possibility of a defiance of everything that tells me not only am I wrong in approach, but wrong in words, and question myself at every turn. For is it not the fear of life that brings everyone to it?
So just sit, just a little bit longer, until my belly is full enough, the potency coursing through my veins bringing me enough... enough love, to stand and bring myself to you.
So that I might share my dream with you.